Clever Confession...

Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman for the
last three weekends."

Father Donavon asks, "Is that you, little Tommy Shaughnessy?"

"Yes, Father, 'tis I."

"And who was the woman you were with?"

"I can't be telling you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."

"Well, Tommy, I'm sure to find out sooner or later, so you may as well tell
me now. Was it Brenda O'Malley?"

"I cannot say Father, please."

"Was it Patricia Kelly?"

"I'll never tell."

"Was it Brydie Sharon?"

"I'm sorry, but I'll not name her."

"Was it Mary Catherine Morgan?"

"My lips are sealed, Father."

"Was it Fiona McDonald then?"

"Please, Father, I cannot tell you."

The priest sighs in frustration. "You're a steadfast lad, Tommy Shaughnessy,
and I admire that. But you've sinned, and you must atone. You cannot attend
church for three months. Be off with you now."

Tommy walks back to his pew. His friend Sean slides over and whispers,
"What'd you get?"

"Three month's vacation and five good leads."